The Sidewalk Movie Pitch
Sprinkles of rain fell as I walked toward Mark's book chat sidewalk. It was a Wednesday around noon. There he was holding a book, sitting with another older man, whose bicycle and cart laden with gear and cans leaned up against a fence. They were talking.
Mark saw me and greeted me by waving the book at me. It was Cannery Row.
A few days ago, I had given Mark my copy of Steinbeck's classic. Today, he told me he was halfway through the novel and loved it. We then launched into the ingenious and inexpensive ways some of the characters who were homeless devised to make homes for themselves and thereby improving their lives and community's general welfare. It is not in the interest of any community's general welfare to have people living on the streets and there needs even more government urgency to address this. Get to it!
We all wondered why this kind of ingenuity seemed utterly lacking in the policies of various government agencies tasked with addressing the crisis. None of us knew.
What was particularly memorable about the book to Mark was how a married couple lived in a discarded boiler out in a field. It was practically a two-storey apartment! The bicycle man chimed in that he'd worked on ships' boilers for 16 years and yes, they were certainly big enough to accommodate two people.
Mark told me not to spoil the rest of Cannery Row for him and I laughed. I sometimes get overly excited about discussing literature in perhaps the same way people talk about the fortunes of the Oregon Ducks football team.
The bicycle man introduced himself as Larry, which for some reason I consider a truly great American name. Not Lawrence. Larry.
Larry was a bearded and wiry man who wore an athletic outfit that harked back to 1970s Fila tennis wear. Indeed, Larry vaguely reminded me of an older Bjorn Borg had the Swedish tennis legend ended up living on the streets in Portland.
We talked books for a few minutes and then Larry said he had an idea for a movie. He was writing a script! It was a combination of Conspiracy Theory, Enemy of the State and The Truman Show.
I said, “Let's pretend I'm a Hollywood producer and I met you on this sidewalk. You have one minute to pitch the movie.”
Larry ripped into the pitch with gusto.
And?
It was hard to follow, but from what I pieced together it was the story of a genetically modified man who grows up unaware of his alteration, but eventually discovers the truth and starts kicking ass on rogue elements within the CIA or NSA or FBI.
“Well, write it up!” I said.
“I've started to but writing dialogue is so hard.”
Yes, it is. That's why I marvel every time I read a novel written by Elmore Leonard, easily the best writer of dialogue in American literary history.
“What's the title?” I said.
“Remotely Controlled,” said Larry.
“I like it.”
And I did.